Minneord i gravferden til Andrew Francis Lailey (19.1.1953-23.3.2020)
i Nittedal kirke 3.april 2020.
By vicar Kjell A. Skartseterhagen
Being with your family the other day was nice, even though the occassion was sad and these are difficult times. Even so, I enjoyed learning more about Andrews life, or Andy as you called him, and as we shall refer to him as hereafter. We would now like to share memories with those of you who are present in the church today. These words of memorial will be important as they can also be shared with people who would have liked to be here, but cant for reasons we are all familiar with. So let me start at the very beginning.
For that we have to travel across the North Sea to the village of Chalfont St.Peter just outside London. It was there Andy made his entrance into the world on the 19th of january 1953. Patricia or «Trish» gained a little brother. She and Andy gained another little brother when Richard arrived. The three of them were Hazel and Patricks children. Andy grew up in Chalfont and lived there until he left for Norway. It was here he received his education, and took part in activities such as boy scouts, cricket and football. Andy was an Arsenal-supporter all his life, as it was a «local» London club to where he grew up.
The printing profession was a common one in Andys family, and he also qualified as a printer. Torilds family was also one with connections to the trade, and they shared this background when they met. She had travelled to England with a friend, and worked in a local school.
Where do people meet in England Well, often in a pub. So too for Andy and Torild. They were both young in august 1970 and have known each other their entire adult life nearly 50 years.
Torild originally thought Andy was 18. He did, after all, drive a car! Andy later had to admit to being only 17. The age limit for learning to drive is different in England. They became a couple around Christmas and new year of 1970-71. Andy attended college in Watford at the time, and completed his apprenticeship in 1974. They moved to Norway and he started his printing career in his father-in-law Haralds company. He later worked at Oskar Andersen for a while, before joining Aftenposten/ Schibsted Trykk in 1986. This remained his place of work until he retired in 2015.
Andy and Torild married right here in Nittedal church in 1974. They arrived in Norway earlier the same year along with their close friends; Torild and Liv, who had travelled to England together, and. Andy and Andy from Chalfont. They made their first home in the apartments at Nedre Nygård where they spent the next four years-with Andy and Liv as their closest neighbours across the hallway.
This was Ninas first childhood home when she entered the world in 1975. By the time Michelle arrived in 1979, they had bought a small cabin on the piece of land where they later built their house. Kevin arrived after the hard work had been done 1984, into the house in Bekkefaret 4, Hagan.
Andy very quickly adopted Norwegian ways. He learned the language within a year, and went all in, getting into skiing, hunting and fishing. He bought himself a hunting dog and had some lovely experiences with Timmy the spaniel, and later Copper. He enjoyed mountain walks with the dog, and that was probably more the attraction than the actual hunt.
Andy turned his hand to anything; ten-pin-bowling, choir, and playing football for Nittedal Idrettslag. And, of course, golf. Golf and football were his passions and he was happy to share the experiences with family and friends, as a participant as well as a spectator.
Many of the experiences were organized by Aftenposten, such as bowling, golf and choir practice. Andy was an incredibly sociable person who loved surrounding himself with people whether he was travelling or spending time in the company of countless friends. This is probably why he managed to learn the language so quickly.
He didnt get around to taking a Norwegian citizenship which has recently been legalized without giving up the British one. He always fitted in wherever he wanted to, and enjoyed joining in. He spent many holiday on car journeys along with family and friends. Often with a caravan or tent. Often in a group of several families, many of whom were co-workers at Aftenposten. There were so many good times.
You went to England every year for years, often catching the ferry from Gothenburg to visit his parents and siblings, which he enjoyed. His parents would also join you on trips through Europe to Yugoslavia, Spain, France, Norway and Italy.
Andy was knowledgeable and particularly interested in history. He had immense knowledge of the world wars, and during the trips through Europe he would go to historical places like Omaha Beach. This meant travelling around in a caravan and later a campervan was a big advantage, so you could stop wherever you wanted to. He loved watching documentaries on TV. Again, war history was of particular interest.
For the family Andy was a proper Mr.Fix-it. He could turn his hand to anything and offer a solution to every problem from fixing cars, carpentry or matters of the heart. Mother-in-law Birgit has described him as a man who can do anything, from repairing cars to baking cakes ». He would always take part in any activity the kids were interested in and always offered support, even coaching Kevins football team.
Andy and son-in-law Robert enjoyed each others company. The TV was always on, and they shared a keen interest in any sport.
Andy was blessed with a sense of humour. He enjoyed laughter and lively company He would stand out in any crowd, and was never afraid of a challenge he would throw himself into anything. Moving to a country like Norway, putting on a pair of skis and trying to hang on to a dog that was pulling a sledge was just typical of him. He would have a dark as well as a light sense of humour and was known for being very witty. Being with Andy was always fun.
You spent a lot of time in Spain during the last few years, and as the children grew up and left home, golf became a favourite passtime. You have travelled the world together, playing golf. You also have an appartment on Condado de Alhama golf resort, about an hour from Alicante. You would travel there through Europe in the campervan in the autumn and drive it back in the spring, and have made so many good friends on the resort.
Andy and Torild have travelled far and wide. You have visited the USA, New Zealand, Australia, Thailand and South Africa, and all of Europe. The golf clubs would be amongst the luggage. You travelled around England, Scotland and Wales last spring, only returning Norway for the 17th of May. You had a lovely time and he was feeling entirely well. You enjoyed many a travel experience with the children, even after they had grown up, as well as Robert and the grandcildren Mathias, Hannah, Patrick and Philip. Andy has lived a full life, and a good life. And he did love life.
Andy was diagnosed with cancer in 2005, and had to remove a kidney. He recovered completely and enjoyed 14 years of good health, 5 of them in early retirement.
Until last summer. The cancer returned, and from Christmas day, it has made a devastating impact on life.
When Andy passed away on the 23th of March you lost a man you all loved very much. The rock of the family. There was never any drama or conflict. No unspoken words, and no regrets. That is a great comfort to think back on now.
There are many good words connected to the beautiful flowers here in the church today, and I will read some final farewells and good wishes
We bless the memory of Andrew Francis Lailey.
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